Dwayne

I have two which inevitably lead to disasters: Lebensohl Archimedes. Neither for the faint hearted. Dwayno. East wing, Katingal.

Nikos, I too saw the original comment that said: but quite frankly didn't think it worthy of a response. Perhaps the original author would like to cite examples where commentators demonstrably had "no idea of the real world". Take your time. Dwayne-offski. Table 14, Lake Titicaca.

I'm with Guggie on this one. If you're going to consider awaring 6♥x, then at least consider 7♥X making as a possible score. Where is declarer's 12th trick? Or is the director assuming a revoke by either East or West. xx wrote That's a given but you can't manufacture a 12 the trick for NS just because EW were a pair of (alleged) ratbags. Bring back the rope ! Dwayne Springsteen Room 222

Give these guys a break. I've read through all 39 replies thus far to Cheech's original post and if I get his right, you (collectively): - either like the frivolous chat or don't like it - find the jokes amusing or don't - want the commentators to stick to technical comment only or not - like some commentators or dislike them. - others you dislike or alternatively like. Hmm.. seems you can't please all of the people all of the time. No wait...we can. [lightbulb illuminates]. Instead of having say: Closed Room: English language commentary Open Room: Italian Commentary (or other by design) We encourage Roland to set up the Vugraph as: Closed Room: Serious, Dry Commentary only (max 2 non-technical comments per board) Open Room: Laff-a-minute. Warning: Commentators may discuss private lives. That should do it. Suit me too. Dwaynold Duck. Planet Bollywood.

Karl wrote: That's all very well Karl but whenever you do so you are violating the Laws of Bridge. And I quote: Law 67C Clarification Required for Claim A claim should be accompanied at once by a statement of clarification as to the order in which cards will be played, the line of play or defence through which the claimer proposes to win the tricks claimed. (Yes, yes..I know what we play on BBO is not really bridge but a game similar to bridge but for all intents and purposes we need to follow some rules) ...Only one possible line of play? With 4 tricks left there are at least 4 lines of play. I agree fewer than the four may be sensible or normal but we've seen it all..havent we? I put it to you Karl that you because it just...well it's just too much damn trouble to type a lengthy line of play in that teeny box. Am I right or am I right? Dwaynster. Pluto.

inquiry wrote: I'm not convinced this is true for all sequences but I'm open to arguments. After all, is 1♣ - 1♥ (4♠) takeout? No fit has been found. There is, after all, a school of thought that says when either side bids NT naturally, then doubles are for penalties. I'm not sure I subscribe to this view either, mind you. Dwayne

We must get both suits across and starting with 4♣ seems the most sensible approach. Traditionally, for the Majors, we can always rip partner's 4♠ to 5D. Then if it's not a morning match, partner will get the gig. Dwayne.

I'm with you Hog, I need to take a bid on this hand but you've presented a curly one. 2D must be cue raise. X is probably penalties and I'm not really good enough to force with 2♥ or 2♣. I hate the stiff in partner's suit. 2NT would probably tell partner to do something intelligent because I can't, but that forces us to the 3-level. btw, what is the vulnerabilty? Probably good to know if the oppos play 4- or 5-card Majors and what 1D promises. If 1D promises 3 then I'm more inclined to take a pot at doubling. Ultimately, I think 2♣ is the lesser of all evils. Dwayne.

I open the hand, but I think 5♥ is a sufficient rebid. Partner's still in the game, after all. 5♠ would be a grand-slam force and those control-less clubs worry me. Dwayne.

Good point dt. Actually that got me thinking. we all know the chances of winning Lotto (say 6 from 46) if you don't buy a ticket is ..well..it's 0. But if you buy a ticket..and to be fair let's say you buy 10 games your chances increase to a staggering 1 in 936682. I say we dont form a syndicate. Agreed? Dwaynester.

keylime wrote: So I'd thought I'd amuse myself and trawl the internet: - The odds of winning the California Super Lotto Jackpot are 1 in 18 million - Dealt a royal flush on the opening hand in a poker game (1 in 649,739) - Killed by terrorists while traveling abroad (1 in 650,000) - Die during an average life span from: flesh-eating bacteria (1 in 1 million) heart disease from eating a broiled steak a week (1 in 48,000) a lightning strike (1 in 30,000) cancer from eating a peanut butter sandwich a day (1 in 5,000) Which I know means nothing but at least the Nickell team should cut down on their peanut butter sandwich intake. Dwayne-entino

Stansby-Martel. Redouble. Dwayne-da-rat.

3♠ splinter agreeing diamonds. At worst partner is a 4-4-3-2. 3♠ doesnt set diamonds. It merely expresses an opinion about your hand. A great player once said "Bridge is a Conversation". Let your bidding box do the talking !! Dwayne-o-mite.

I concur with Bruce 115%. If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen. D-wayne-eroo

Given you're in a game-forcing sequence then X by you should be for penalties. But I don't understand why you would double 3H for penalties? What is your source of tricks? In my experience the best way to get out of traps set by psyching opponents (if you're sure they're psyching of course) is to make a Tasmanian asking bid. Dwayneoffski. (with tongue firmly planted in cheek).

It's not often that there are intelligent, well-articulated and apparently (bridge) legally sound responses to threads in this forum. Well done key. As key points out - Directors must treat each incident on its merits and use the Laws as they would in face-to-face bridge (Ok, I know on-line bridge is not real bridge, but a game quite similar to bridge, but for the purposes of jurisprudence we'll assume it's the same). How often is a player in face-to-face bridge asked to pack up his pencil and system card and escorted from the premises? Yes, in on-line bridge the "yacking continues" because unlike in real life there is not a Director standing at one's should looking intimidating. And yes, I'd like to think that a Director with a modicum of ability and a working knowledge of the Laws will rule equitably (mental note - don't go there). That there is no Appeal process is regrettable but understandable in a practical sense - but Heaven knows what may happen when our North American friends play for ACBL masterpoints and feel aggrieved by a Director's decision. D-Wayneamundo.

Too right! I always state a line of play when making a claim. Apart from being part of the Laws (yeah... OK I made that up but I'm sure I'm right and I'm too lazy to look it up) it's just plain polite. I almost always reject non-obvious (non-clarified) claims too - not just on principle but see above. Furthermore, whenever my explained claims are rejected and the opponents say "please play" I never do... I almost always say "no, I better call the Director (or a yellow), that's the Laws of bridge". Typically...this stops them in their tracks. Stamp out claim non-explainers! aaaah. I feel better already. Dwayne-boy.

I'm not sure how to use Last Train but you might like to hum along to this popular little ditty. Last Train to Clarksville as sung by the Monkees Words and Music by Tommy Boyce and Bobby Hart Take the last train to Clarksville, And I'll meet you at the station. You can be be there by four thirty, 'Cause I made your reservation. Don't be slow, oh, no, no, no! Oh, no, no, no! 'Cause I'm leavin' in the morning And I must see you again We'll have one more night together 'Til the morning brings my train. And I must go, oh, no, no, no! Oh, no, no, no! And I don't know if I'm ever coming home. Take the last train to Clarksville. I'll be waiting at the station. We'll have time for coffee flavored kisses And a bit of conversation. Oh... Oh, no, no, no! Oh, no, no, no! Take the last train to Clarksville, Now I must hang up the phone. I can't hear you in this noisy Railroad station all alone. I'm feelin' low. Oh, no, no, no! Oh, no, no, no! And I don't know if I'm ever coming home. Take the last train to Clarksville, Take the last train to Clarksville, [repeat and fade] ------------------------------- DWayne-orama

Seeking established pair, of national or better level, to join national level Australian pair for 1 week bridge - Australian National Open Teams - 3rd Week Jan 2005. Interested parties to respond privately stating experience, verifiable results and a contact with their NCBO. An appropriate travel and accommodation subsidy will be considered comensurate with ability/ experience/ past results. All applications will be treated with the utmost privacy. Dwayne Australia.

ruoti il commerciante Ciao bello D-Waynemeister.

I think it's a poor bidding philosophy to assume partner is asking "do you have 4 cards in the suit I bid" when they respond to your opening bid. On the contrary, they are making a statement "I have at least 4-cards in the suit I have just bid". The question the response should pose is "Now that you know a bit about my hand, what do you think?". Dwanyo-mite.

Hog, there was a similar hand in this year's SWPT. Round 11, Bd 12. Trumps were AQ83 opposite T962. I fluked the play for one loser but ran into Tim at an Indian restaurant later that night and, quick as a flash, the maestro said cashing the Ace is best. Different pips, different hand, sure, but nothing like 60 years of daily bridge to drum those suit combinations in. Dee-Wayne.

que sera. Dwayne.

Nikos said: I can find no better quote in this entire thread that encapsulates the injustices committed to Dr Todd and his partner in this sorry saga. Dwayne

I am a Taurus who likes Chinese Food, walking in the rain and eating Chinese food in the rain. My favourite all-time movie is Alien 2. Dwayne