Jump to content

Multiple personality disorder (mine)


kenberg

Recommended Posts

As Thoroughly Modern Kenny I am pleased to report I have three computers in the house, one on every floor. In my Certified Old Fart persona, I can report that they sometimes drive me nuts. The Dell Inspiron with Windows 7 is on the main floor, near the coffee pot. The keyboard has many features. Buttons on the top with cryptic icons. Buttons on the left and right with cryptic abbreviations. And I have ten thumbs where my fingers should be. One of these buttons, I am hoping someday to meet its inventor, apparently sends a message to the computer that it should erase the paragraph I just typed and place the cursor in the middle of a previous paragraph. Impervious to Edit/Undo.

 

 

Ellen Goodman used to write a column for the Washington Post. She once wrote caustically about her purchase of a new washing machine. It came with a huge manual explaining all the Functions. It's a machine conspiracy to reduce us all to babbling dependency and incoherence.

 

 

Yeah, yeah, I know. Some people claim there's a computer to blame but I know, it's my own damn fault.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

And I have ten thumbs where my fingers should be. One of these buttons, I am hoping someday to meet its inventor, apparently sends a message to the computer that it should erase the paragraph I just typed and place the cursor in the middle of a previous paragraph. Impervious to Edit/Undo.

I recognize that. I wonder if it would be possible to implement a "what did I do wrong?" function that could give you a list of the last, say, ten mouseclick or keystroke actions you made and what consequences they had, then one could identify the culprit and maybe chose to disable it if it's a feature one would never use on purpose but sometimes by accident (the capslock button is the most obvious example, and I have physically removed it from my keyboard on one computer, and muted it in keyboard setup on another. But there appear to be some similar ones which I can't identify).

 

Anyway, I think I have only one personality online. And to paraphrase Peachy, without the internet I would have no personality whatsoever.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I got talked into buying a keyboard with lots of features at a bargain price.

 

HOWEVER! It's made in China with a DVD (in Mandarin) and 112 page manual written by people who speak 17 languages, none of them English, although they try.

 

Some of the quotes from this manual would make Yogi Berra tear up.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

One of these buttons, I am hoping someday to meet its inventor, apparently sends a message to the computer that it should erase the paragraph I just typed and place the cursor in the middle of a previous paragraph.

He is probably hiding in the same place, as the person who constructed my $100+ pots, where the handles get to hot to touch during normal cooking.

 

(No, I don't pay $100 for a pot, but my sweet mother went to the store, and asked for the best for her son.)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
×
×
  • Create New...