Al_U_Card Posted November 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When Chuck Norris says glp, you know that all of your finesses are working. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dicklont Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When Chuck Norris says European, you have to go to the bathroom. To take a bath coupe? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
y66 Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When Alan Sontag forgets to call his mother, she asks him why he can't play as fast as Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris never forgets to call his mother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brianshark Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 "When Chuck Norris calls for a card from dummy, it starts moving by itself." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al_U_Card Posted November 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When Chuck Norris calls for a director it is because he is going to make a movie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al_U_Card Posted November 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 Chuck Norris is also the only one-man committee. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
han Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When Chuck Norris hits the deck, suits break badly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cherdano Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When Chuck Norris hits the deck, suits break badly. When Chuck Norris makes the cut, suits break badly! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matmat Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 when chuck norris bids a grand, the defenders concede before leading. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lobowolf Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When Chuck Norris claims, he is NEVER "required" to state a line of play. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al_U_Card Posted November 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 when chuck norris bids a grand, the defenders concede before leading. Batting 1000... :D When Chuck Norris leads out of turn, he selects the option for declarer and it is always "accept the lead". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matmat Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 for our European friends... when chuck norris uses a bridgemate, the device has two choices: work or be crushed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
han Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When Chuck Norris hits the deck, suits break badly. When Chuck Norris makes the cut, suits break badly! Now why didn't I think of that. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al_U_Card Posted November 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 Chuck Norris' partners never have to use key-card because Chuck ALWAYS has all 5 aces (and they are real aces......no kings for Chuck) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lobowolf Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When Chuck Norris leads out of turn, you don't have 5 options; you have 1: You WILL accept it. Hey! Hey! Intellectual property infringement! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
han Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When partner makes a grand slam try, Chuck Norris kicks it in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al_U_Card Posted November 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them. (I know, it's not bridge-related, but it IS my favorite, and it IS the Water Cooler). More in keeping with the original post: When Chuck Norris leads out of turn, you don't have 5 options; you have 1: You WILL accept it. Kudos to the author, I missed that post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pclayton Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 Chuck Norris' partners never have to use key-card because Chuck ALWAYS has all 5 aces (and they are real aces......no kings for Chuck) Um, Chuck's partners never use key card. Chuck is always captain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keylime Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When Chuck Norris plays a strong club, his partner wears football padding to minimialize the forcing nature of the bid. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keylime Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When Chuck Norris preempts, the world stops in awe of his bridge skill. When Chuck Norris responds to a a preempt, partner will become dummy to keep living. When Chuck Norris overcalls a preempt, LHO will never use a cuebid out of fear that Chuck Norris will kill him with the card of the overcall only. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pclayton Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 Chuck's Double card is a lethal weapon in 38 states and it cannot be carried on airplanes. I cannot even discuss the redouble card for fear that my keyboard will catch on fire. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matmat Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 Chuck Norris' favorite ace-ask is kickback, and he knows how to use it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al_U_Card Posted November 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 The last time Chuck Norris executed a trump coup, three South American governments fell. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al_U_Card Posted November 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 When Chuck Norris endplays you, your game is finished. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lobowolf Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 Chuck Norris' partners never have to use key-card because Chuck ALWAYS has all 5 aces (and they are real aces......no kings for Chuck) Um, Chuck's partners never use key card. Chuck is always captain. My new favorite. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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