xx1943 Posted August 2, 2004 Report Share Posted August 2, 2004 Another funny story: Today in VQAN when I made the usual announcements before tournament starts:xx1943->Lobby: !H!H ** Very Quick and Nice ** for VERY FAST PLAYERS only starts soon !H!Hxx1943->Tournament: !D!D Be sure you have read the RULES of this tournament. !D!Dxx1943->Tournament: !S!D!S Register only, if your connection is 100% ok. !S!D!Two minutes to go til start; 60 pairs registered; suddenly a player said:player (Lobby): Hi, quick point. "Very Quick and Nice" says "Read the RULES before register!!!!!" but there are no rules -- click on ...player (Lobby): "Tournament Rules" and you get a blank page.->player: ty :=) player (Lobby): Thanks, wow, you fixed that quickly! Very nice; I forgot :rolleyes: to upload my nice rules and nobody but one noticed. :P To post tournament rules seems very futile, B) because almost nobody reads them. :D Posting rules imo serves only the purpose to be on the right side, of someone complains about TDs decisions. Cheers Al Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McBruce Posted August 2, 2004 Report Share Posted August 2, 2004 I announce most of my conditions of contest in three floods of messages in the first three one-board rounds once subs are settled and everyone is present. I tell people to continue playing and read them by scrolling back when they have a chance. Occasionally I get complaints from people who say I talk too much, and compared to most other TDs I certainly do make a lot of announcements. But the ability to scroll back and read the rules when you are unsure of something is cited more often by players having a problem. And not only that, over-announcing online is very different from yelling out announcements in a club. Online you do not bother anyone except the most sensitive, since the announcement stays in their chat area and can be read later. In a club, making an announcement stops everything at every table. There are still those who won't read anything though. Usually it is a language barrier. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paulhar Posted August 2, 2004 Report Share Posted August 2, 2004 To post tournament rules seems very futile, :) because almost nobody reads them. :) If the touney description tells me to read the rules, I always read the rules. Once I saw in the rules 'Cross-IMPS' and the tournament description said Matchpoints I let the TD know and the tourney description was quickly fixed to CrossImps. Too bad - I had already registered with one of my favorite matchpoint partners :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xx1943 Posted August 3, 2004 Report Share Posted August 3, 2004 To post tournament rules seems very futile, :angry: because almost nobody reads them. :blink: If the touney description tells me to read the rules, I always read the rules. Once I saw in the rules 'Cross-IMPS' and the tournament description said Matchpoints I let the TD know and the tourney description was quickly fixed to CrossImps. Too bad - I had already registered with one of my favorite matchpoint partners :lol: Hi Paul you are one of the rare exception reading rules. About TD's mistake´: NOBODY IS PERFECT. :P Cheers Al Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mirjam_3 Posted October 21, 2004 Report Share Posted October 21, 2004 Two polish players are not very happy with each other. They start talking in polish. I remind them to use english only. One player A says: "Ok, sorry."The other one B says: "I no english, i like polish." I said to B: "Sorry, if u do not speak english i blacklist u for further Glamour tournaments. When u learned some english, plse tell me and i unblack u." I hoped he was able to understand this and/or he could find someone who told him the meaning. Well, he understood me very well. A started in polish again. B to me: "Now u plse black A." :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
helium Posted October 21, 2004 Report Share Posted October 21, 2004 Playing in a tourney, Aisha: i got bad connection here all. Might get disconnected :) Opp: OK but we nearly finished Aisha gets disconnected. Opps gettting nervous and the lady opp says we wont finish......Think is is time to start talking... Opp: You think aisha coming back Slothy. Shall we call host? Slothy: Give her a few minutes...she runs out of coal sometimes to fuel the computer... Opp: OK. We wont FINISH!! (thinking this hand a top anyway, might try and make it amusing...) Slothy: Oh My GOd. She just phoning me. There is a man trying to break into her house!!!! Opp: Oh no!!! Slothy: Yesss, its the postman apparently!!! Slothy: The postman has forced himself into her house, hit the Rottwieller over the head with a wholemeal baguette, and forced her at gun-point to lick her stamp for a letter he gave her !! Do you think i should call the police? Opp: Sorry dont understand much. Is she is in danger??? (Me: sorry i couldnt believe this remark; seems i got her hooked....Gonna milk this) Slothy: Well, it is quite a large stamp and her tongue isnt that big, although by the amount she talks you would have thought differently. Slothy: Going back to your previous remark, I dont know about Aisha, but this contract is in danger!!! Oh noooooo, she is screaming down the phone now!!!! She is screaming something like "Tra fishq ma na allah. " Geez i wish she wouldn't scream in Arabic when she is in a life-threatening situation... Opp: Do you speak Arabic? Slothy: Only a bit, but hard to understand somebody when their tongue is covered in adhesive gum....I think she is shouting something like "The King of spades is with West!!!". Out of curiousity, is she correct? Opp: OK :) you are joking!!! Please play.... Slothy: Oh my God!!! there is a funny sound on the phone....seems like the Rottwieler is eating the mobile phone!!! Theres a thhwwaaah thwwaaaaah grtteeettrr klump brrrr brrr sound...Dont want this Rottwiler to choke..she only bought it 3 weeks ago....DOWN Rover DOWN, let go let go, nice boy...... Opp: Please play!!!! There is only 5 minutes. I cant beleive this!! Slothy: I cant believe she called it Rover too. She hasn't got much of an imagination huh? Slothy: No problem, only 4 cards to play....anyway Aisha to play. Have you heard a Rottwieler chewing a mobile, <opp name>. It is quite interesting. Sounds like the opening of a EMINEM rap song (a white guy in dungerees for thos who arent generationally aware) Aisha: Back, sorry, i got disconnected. Slothy: How is the Rottwieler? Aisha: Huh. Slothy: Claim all tricks opp :) ..... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luke warm Posted October 21, 2004 Report Share Posted October 21, 2004 and he does that stuff on the fly... you'd swear he writes some of it down ahead of time Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rigour6 Posted November 5, 2004 Report Share Posted November 5, 2004 Player: Adj Bd please, opps no bidMe: Which board please?Player: Board 3, Opps no bid and we down 3Me: Ok I will review. Continue play please. (my standard answer, plus at this point I am thinking "what the hell?")(after I watch the movie)Me: Bd 3 looks Ok to me. What's your feeling?Player: Has 15 Pts but doesn't bid when p bids.Me: Yes, it looks like a trap pass to me.Player: But opp did not alert that pass was trap pass. Hmmmmmmmm. Player: I need adj plsMe: Which board please?Player: Not board, I need adj of partner.Me: I feel your pain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rigour6 Posted November 8, 2004 Report Share Posted November 8, 2004 From a tournament I was playing and and TDing: Rigour6: Hi guys, I am playing, so can't come to tables. Is there a problem at Tables 1 and 6? (pause) Rigour6: Whoops, I am at Table 6. So obviously that is what the problem is here. (longer pause) Rigour6: I am not at Table 6. I promise to quit drinking and TDing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luke warm Posted November 9, 2004 Report Share Posted November 9, 2004 i can say that each time was a nightmare of Kafkaesque proportions.... kaf who? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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