inquiry Posted August 15, 2006 Report Share Posted August 15, 2006 Captain of a pirate ship gets a call from the look out. "Captain, I see three warships on the horizon approaching fast" The captain says to the cabin boy, "quick boy, run fetch meeze my red shirt so I can put it on." When the cabin boy returns with the shirt, the helmsman ask the captain, "Why did you want to wear your red shirt?" The captain replies "so that if I get slashed by a saber in the fighting, the men will not see the blood on my shirt and be discouraged" The battle went well for the pirates... a few days later, the Look out, yells down to the captain. "Captain, I see twenty warships on the horizon appoaching fast." The captain says to the cabin boy, "quick boy, run and fetch meeze brown pants." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sceptic Posted August 15, 2006 Report Share Posted August 15, 2006 15 year old boy to his Father" Dad, I want to marry Mary White" "you can't son, she is your half sister, I was bit of a stud when I was younger and sewn my wild oats all over the place" "Dad, I want to marry Terresa Smith" "you can't son, she is your half sister also" with this the boy sits on the front porch all dejected and sad, along comes his mother and says "whats up son you look sad" "It is like this mum, I wanted to marry Mary White and dad said she is my half sister and I can't marry her, then I told him I wanted to marry Terresa smith and he said I can't because she is my half sister" HAHAHA said the mother, "you go and marry who you like, he is not really your father" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lalislol Posted August 16, 2006 Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 ;) Just found this Topic...late for finals, but maybe in time for 'ice-breaker' joke-fest.This is an oldtimer that I like...still find some who haven't heard it. MANLY PURSUITS Amos is sitting on his porch when his new neighbor, John, saunters over. John is looking for somehing to do, and would like to work up a friendship with Amos. John: 'Hey Amos, I hear the trout are biting. Let's go fishing.'Amos: 'Nah. Tried that once...didn't like it.' John: 'Well, the gun club is having a target shoot. Let's try out my new rifle.'Amos: 'Nah. Tried that once...didn't like it.' John: 'Poker game at Harry's tonight.'Amos: 'Nah. Tried that once...didn't like it.' John: 'Bowling?'Amos: 'Nah. Tried that once...didn't like it.' Just then, a little boy came out of the house and jumped into Amos' lap. John: 'Who's this handsome little fella?'Amos: 'My son.' John: 'Your only child?' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sceptic Posted September 1, 2006 Report Share Posted September 1, 2006 A farmer is wondering how many sheep he has in his field, so he asks >his sheepdog to count them. The dog runs into the field, counts >them, and then runs back to his master.>>"So," says the farmer. "How many sheep were there?">>"40," replies the dog.>>"How can there be 40?" exclaims the farmer. "I only bought 38!">>"I know," says the dog. "But I rounded them up."> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rain Posted September 1, 2006 Report Share Posted September 1, 2006 A farmer is wondering how many sheep he has in his field, so he asks >his sheepdog to count them. The dog runs into the field, counts >them, and then runs back to his master.>>"So," says the farmer. "How many sheep were there?">>"40," replies the dog.>>"How can there be 40?" exclaims the farmer. "I only bought 38!">>"I know," says the dog. "But I rounded them up."> Such a smart dog. Talks and does maths :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.