Game from Hell

[ehhh]

This was e-mailed 2me by an friend.

His way of describing the events

I thot might be amuse the club director out there.

 

Hi:

You would not have believed yesterday afternoon:

You'll get a chuckle out of visualizing the state of my blood pressure...lol

 

I showed up to direct and play with Shirleyanne (SA).

 

Then:

Dick showed up without a partner

Plan A: match him up with SA

 

Then:

Dorothy got confused about the date and showed up to direct

Plan B: match her up with Dick and I'm back to playing with SA

 

Then:

At game time Jerry, Bob's partner (Jack)

and Sine's partner (Dave ) are all missing.

 

Plan C, D, E:

Match Sine up with Dick

Match SA up with Bob

Hope Jerry arrives a few minutes late as he often does

I can direct and Dorothy can go shopping. (we'd have made half a table)

 

Then:

Jerry arrives a couple of minutes late as you expect

mid way through the first round, Jack arrives.

 

Plan F:

put Jack in with Bob and make SA and Dorothy a bumping pair

I don't give a rat's ass if SA plays board one twice (once in each direction)

 

If Dave arrives b4 the end of the 1st rd, the bump can go, that pair becomes 15NS

I can play with him and we'll have 15 full, us being 15EW

If he's later than that, I hope he enjoys shopping

(he never does arrive)

 

The game then moves at glacial speed, losing maybe 15 min over the day

Could not get them to play anywhere near close to on time

 

After the 4th rd Marlene is not feeling well and askes to go home

 

Plan G:

I fill in and play with Margaret (Marlene's partner)

 

Later, as is your norm, you announce

"Three rounds to go;

two rounds to go,

and last round"

This, you will discover, does not help

 

With one round to go

A pair says " I guess we're all done. Our opponents went home"

 

Plan F:

We find the missing pair in the parking lot and restore order...we think.....'cause

meanwhile another player goes home leaving Helen partnerless for the last round;

needless to say, I'm going to be quite late getting to the last round

 

Jan and Val have last round sitout as they are bumped

 

Plan G:

Have Jan play the last round with Isabel

 

Plan H (4 Hell):

Have Val play the last round with Margaret and i can

start to get at the scores...some of which are coming in before i can

even think of getting to the last round.

 

4:20 PM. It is scored up and you're out the door

Another day at the bridge club....lol

 

At least nobody died.

 

ps

And to top it off, I miscounted spades (in fact i didn't count them at all)

and went down in a cold slam. Imagine that!

[Gerben42]

And to top it off, I miscounted spades (in fact i didn't count them at all)

and went down in a cold slam. Imagine that!

 

It is well known that being a director costs points. It's because, aware or not aware, you are concentrating on directing the tournament, especially on an afternoon like this. Many people are not aware of what a TD does and how this affects him, and if partner is one of them, that doesn't help.